The pound cake jinx

Its holiday baking time! Filling the kitchen with the Heavenly smells of breads, cakes, cookies, and pies is one of the best things about Christmas, don’t ya think? I’ve been wanting a good pound cake, but in order to get it I have to beg the hubby to make it for me and go far away while it’s in the oven. It’s the only kind of cake I not only can’t make, but also can’t be around when someone else is making it.

When we were living next door to my aunt and uncle, around my angst-ridden pre-teen years, making a pound cake was Aunt Sue’s greatest challenge. One day she made five cakes, and every one of them fell. She kept trying because she wanted to understand what she was doing wrong, to figure out how to fix it. 

On her sixth cake, I walked up the road to my best friend’s house. Amazingly, the cake came out perfect. So Aunt Sue surmised that I must be the one causing the cakes to fall. That’s ridiculous!  I thought, but lo-and-behold, the next time Mom baked a pound cake, it fell. I was in the house. She told me to leave. “Get out of here, Deanna. Go somewhere so I can bake this pound cake.”  Just like that! 

I hung my head and went to Bev’s house again, feeling like a dog that’d pooped on the couch. When I returned, there was a perfectly golden pound cake ready to be eaten. 

When I married Jim and told him this story, he said my jinx status must be pure malarkey, what with all the cakes I baked myself that came out just fine, (aside from the Italian crème cake, which fell over, but that’s another story). He decided to test the theory, and commenced to mixing the batter for a pound cake. 

“Would you like me to leave?” I asked him.

“No”, he said, “That would defeat the purpose. I want to prove that you’re not a pound cake jinx.”

“Okay. Don’t say I didn’t warn you.”

An hour and a half later, we were staring at the pound cake he pulled out of the oven, complete with a deep gash smack-dab in the middle.

So I’m going to pack an overnight bag and ask Jim to make a pound cake for me tomorrow. Make one for yourself – view my recipes page for Mom’s pound cake recipe.  

What’s your favorite thing to bake for the holidays? Is there a tradition behind the recipe? I’d love to hear your story, and the recipe if you feel like sharing.

Happy baking!

You’re a what?

Yes, I changed the look of the blog again! I’ve never been one to let anything alone for very long – just look at the different photos of me out there. What do you think my natural hair color is? I’ve no idea either.

That said, I believe I’m settled with this look [of the blog], for now at least. A new year is on the way and while I don’t normally make resolutions, (why set self up for disappointment, right?), I have been thinking about building my writing career for a while now. I realized, while working on these new pages, that I have in fact been building my writing career, with hardly a thought about the actual process. I believe that’s why it’s working.

About this time last year I finally allowed me to call myself a writer. Sometimes it takes a while to get to that point. A lot of writers don’t feel they can validate that claim without having been published. But I was tired of fighting with the muse I guess and finally just told him to shut up. Yes, my muse is a boy, a snot-nosed little brat if you want to know the whole truth. Once I reached the decision to call myself a writer, and to tell others I’m a writer, I was free to…write. And though it did take some time, I became published. Incidentally, my family has started calling me “the writer” too. Therefore, I feel comfortable in now calling myself an author.  

Merriam-Webster defines an author as “one that originates or creates; the writer of a literary work (as a book)”. Nowhere does it say “one who is published”. So I could’ve been calling myself an author all along. But I’m glad I didn’t. I’m glad I took those baby steps. I believe that helped to keep me from stressing myself out, and from putting too much pressure on myself to “produce already”! I’m sure I don’t need to tell you all that you will never see my nose in the air either, so calling myself an author does not automatically put a brandy sifter in one hand and a Swisher Sweet in the other.

So how has this blog changed? First of all, please know that I have no intention of changing the meaning of The Life of a Working Writer Mommy. Main topics here will still focus on family life, and the ever-popular miscellaneous ramblings of life in general. That’s what garnered the wonderfully loyal readers of my blog, and I certainly don’t want to alienate you all. Besides, it’s just how I write, and there’s no way on earth I’d even want to change that. Something I do hope to accomplish is breathing life into the Soothing Sundays and Writerly Wednesdays posts, both of which have been scarce lately.

What is new? You can now view a list of links to my publishing credits, which includes my monthly column in BIN, and my Christmas memoir short story in Soft Whispers Magazine. This will be an ever-growing list, so be sure to check back. Contact information is also available on this page.

I’ve updated my about page to reflect on why I write. What you used to see on the about page is now on a subpage called ‘Who is Deanna and what is this blog all about?’. I will update this page, (rather than the about page), as life portends.

Thank you, dear, loyal readers for sticking with me and especially for the encouragement to build my world around my passion for writing. That means a lot to me. If you’re new here, welcome! I hope my words will inspire you to be thoughtful and that you will share your comments with me. I love a good conversation, so please do feel free to open your mouth. Indeed, I’m asking you to open your mouth right away. I want to know what you’d like this blog to give you. Browse my categories at the right and tell me what subjects interest you most. Are there subjects not listed that you’d like to discuss? Tell me about them and I will give each one due consideration. I can tell you anything having to do with family life will rise to the top.

And with that I leave you with a favorite quote: “You don’t have to be great to get started, but you do have to get started to be great.” Les Brown

Now let’s get started!

Strong emotions – what do you do with them?

News flash: With the holiday season comes much stress. Yea, I know. It isn’t news to me either, but every year I continue to be shocked at the emotional turmoil I endure during the holidays. Doesn’t it just make so much sense that, if one year we find ourselves running around like a chicken with its head cut off, we’d do something to make sure we don’t get in that same state the next year? Well duh! So why don’t I do something about it? I’ve come to the conclusion that I allow this stress to happen every year because it’s productive. Say who? How could being stressed out possibly be productive? That makes no sense whatsoever. It does if you’re an artist, or maybe it only does to me, but I don’t think so. I believe most everyone can relate.

With a few inches of snow forecast for today, we planned to put up the Christmas tree. I had decided to devote the morning hours to cleaning, in an effort to give the tree and all the accompanying décor a chance to sparkle and shine, rather than having to compete with the dust bunnies. But, even though the hubby slept in, he was still able to get all the storage bins up from the garage before I had a chance to even sweep, (okay, so I may have gotten stuck reading #fridayflash stories). Even though it was my own fault, I was a little irritated that I didn’t get to clean before we had ribbon and bells scattered across the living room. But I tried to tamp down that irritation and be grateful I didn’t get worn out cleaning.

I straightened the stray limbs on the tree and began to attach paper clips to the glass balls. As I pulled more and more ornaments from the bins I was reminded of last Christmas when my step-daughter and her son were here with us. They moved back to New Hampshire only six months after they arrived. It’s a long story to be shared at a later time, but suffice it to say I fell head-over-heels in love with that little man, only 18 months old then, and my heart shattered when they left.

As we put the ornaments on the tree I felt the tears crawling up my chest, begging to be released. I fought them as long as I could before finally giving in and letting them flow. I went to my closet and sat on the floor to have my cry, so as not to spread my sadness to my own sons. When I felt empty I picked myself up and grabbed my tools – sketch pad, charcoals, colored pencils, notebook and pen, and went to my screened porch. It snowed today, a pretty snow, and the naked trees in the front yard were blanketed in sparkling white. I opened my sketch pad and drew that scene. Then the story of the scene came bubbling forth and I switched notebooks and wrote the story of the picture. The words just came flowing. I ended up with two poems and a short story. Yes, I said poems. I don’t write poetry, or at least I didn’t until today.

By the time I put my pen down I was exhausted. But it was a good exhaustion, one that I’m thankful for. This feeling is the very reason I write. When the emotions are surging forth like a river bound for the ocean, something must be done with them. We can either use them for destruction or use them for production. I feel fortunate to have been able to use todays emotions productively.

After resting up I tweeted about the experience, which led to a nice conversation with Claudine Motto, @CoachClaudine on Twitter. She’s a Time Management and Productivity Coach, and a kind person. In one of those tweets she asked “…because emotion gives path to you being/feeling creative? It’s like an outlet?” Exactly. An outlet.

Those of us who create art, whether it be sculpture, stories, paintings, whatever, know how amazing it feels to complete a piece that leaves us exhausted. It beats us up, wears us out, but at the same time it’s so very invigorating. It’s called passion. A love of what you do. That feeling is why we do it.

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed with emotion, be it sadness, anger, even excitement? Do you use that emotion destructively or productively? I hope you use it productively. If you’re having difficulty deciding what to do with strong emotions, try art. You don’t have to be an artist. Just take some paper and pencil, clay, scrapbooking materials, even junk from the garage – whatever you want – to a quiet place and let it out. You’re not being graded, so don’t worry about the result. You can always throw it out when you’re done, but you may be surprised to find that throwing it out is the last thing you want to do.

Keeping in mind that I’m not a poet, here is one of the poems I wrote today. I hope you enjoy it.

Snowed In

Her soul is trapped

Caught under the depths

Of an eerie blanket

A blanket of heavy snow

The heart is squeezed tight

With love?

With hunger?

In preparation of the coming storm

So that tomorrow

She will emerge strong

 And filled with purpose

How would you handle a mean teacher?

While attempting to wake up after the infamous turkey-induced coma on Thanksgiving afternoon, I ran across this tweet on Twitter: “Can 9 year olds suffer from stress? How would you deal with this? Opinions needed [link]” . In the hopes of being able to help I visited the link. I’m glad I did. I could’ve written this blog post myself. This poor woman, Jo Beaufoix, (in the UK), is trying to figure out how to deal with a teacher who gives her 9-year-old daughter so much homework, she has gone from a happy student who has always done well to crying and saying she hates school. It goes a lot further than “too much homework”; read her post for the full story.

 Here’s the comment I left on this post: “Hi Jo. I found your site via Twitter, (RT of this blog by @alisonwells). I have quite a bit of experience with school “issues”. I’m in the US, but it doesn’t sound like there’s much difference in systems. My youngest son sounds a lot like your Miss E. He excels at almost everything he tries, but if not recognized for that effort he quickly becomes downtrodden. Heck, who wouldn’t?! He’s 10 now and in 5th grade, and this has been the toughest year for him yet, mainly because of his teacher. My oldest son is 12, has autism, and had this same teacher before. We had to speak to her about the same things with him. Without writing an entire blog of my own, (which I just may do anyway), my advice is to schedule a meeting with the teacher and tell her what you want, exactly. Go in with a plan drawn up, and let her know what her reward will be for complying – the reward being that you won’t go to her supervisor. It’s important to have your plan written up, mainly to emphasize the fact that you’re serious, but also to give her something to refer to if she’s unsure whether or not she’s “allowed” to give Miss E. homework on a particular evening or not, or whatever.

Miss E. sounds like a brilliant child. She deserves to have that brilliance recognized. I wish you the best of luck.” 

 What do you think? Are our children being given too much homework these days? Should one teacher be allowed to give his/her students more than the other teachers on the same grade level? And how do you feel about rewarding the child who excels, or even the child who may not excel but is obviously putting forth a great deal of effort? Is it a good thing to praise that effort, thus making the child want to be more successful, (in my opinion), or should the teacher prepare the child for the “real world” by showing them they won’t always be complimented for a job well done?

I’d love to hear your opinions but more importantly, Jo needs to hear them. Please visit her site and leave a comment on this post. You can also find Jo on Twitter: @jobeaufoix.

Thank you very much, dear loyal readers, for any words of support you have to offer.

The yumminess of holiday goodies

My sister asks me to make butter pecan cake every year for Thanksgiving, and usually for Christmas too. It is pretty good, if I do say so myself. But don’t take my word for it – try it for yourself. View the recipe here. You’ll just want to make sure you have plenty of time before starting, and do let me know how it turns out for you.

I hope you all had a fantastic Thanksgiving weekend! I did, though I missed Jim and Noah something awful. But Jimmy and I enjoyed our time together, and Jim and Noah are home now. Everyone’s getting ready to go back to school and work tomorrow – everyone but me that is. I have one more day off before I have to go back to work. Woo-hoo! I’m going to spend my “me day” tomorrow writing, writing, writing. Nothing else, just writing. I hope I haven’t just jinxed myself by saying that.

I’ll be posting at least one new blog this week, so stay tuned. I actually started writing one hours ago, but it turned into a long and meandering bunch of pages so I decided to redirect and turn it into the fifteen different pieces it should be. Coming soon – how to deal with difficult teachers, what I’m doing for December’s #fridayflash, writing inspiration from music, and more!

So, how was your holiday weekend?

Miscellaneous rambling

Hey ya’ll! I just wanted to stop in and let you know I have not fallen off the face of the earth, though I have felt like doing just that a few times over the past week. I’ve been busy trying to get ahead with work so I can enjoy my time off during Thanksgiving without worrying that someone might need something. Vacation starts tomorrow! And, good news, my oldest son has decided to stay home with me instead of going with his dad and brother to PA, so at least I won’t be completely alone, although I am taking Monday off too, and the boys will be back in school so I’m going to use that day as my “me time writing day”.  

Jimmy, (my oldest son), and I get to work on a project he’s doing for school – he has to build a model of a WWI trench, or is it WWII, I can’t remember. Let me tell you, the boy is astoundingly gifted when it comes to art. He draws the most incredible mazes you’ve ever seen, and he loves to create anything that has to do with war craft. He is destined to become some sort of engineer, I’m sure of it. When we finish the project I’ll take pictures and post them for you.

Which reminds me, my other son, Noah, drew a self-portrait at school that he brought home yesterday. A bit of background – Noah is talented in many different things, but art is not one of them. That’s why the self-portrait, which he titled “Noah Falling” absolutely floored me. I swear it looks like something a “real artist” drew. Well, see for yourself:

Noah Falling

Is that not fantastic?! The boy is 10-years-old!

Yes, I’m having a mommy-brag kind of day.

Although this past week has been hectic, I’m happy to say I did accomplish something. I wrote a love story! I’m so happy I finally found a character that isn’t morbid! I could jump up and down and about pee my britches. Of course that doesn’t mean the story is any good, but I did it, and that’s the important thing. I was truly beginning to wonder about myself, what with all the suspense, and horror I’ve written lately.

To find out if the love story is any good or not, I’ll be posting it as my #fridayflash on The Other Side of Deanna this Friday, after I’ve edited of course. It is in rough phase right now. I just hope some wacko character doesn’t come along and shoot it down.

Speaking of #fridayflash, our amazing host, JM Strother, over at Mad Utopia, is heading up the effort to create an anthology in celebration of the 6 month anniversary of #fridayflash. I’m sure I speak for all #fridayflash contributors in saying Thank You very much Jon for all you do for us! And that’s a lot!

As part of this effort, we authors must choose up to three of our #fridayflash stories to be considered for the anthology. Since I got a late start in writing for #fridayflash, I’m fortunate enough not to have too many to choose from. However, there are five Fridays yet to come that can be included in the choices, so, considering I post one each week, there will be more choices. With just what I have right now, I’m fairly sure which ones I want to submit, but I’d like your help in deciding, if you would be so kind. As we get closer to the submission date I’ll post a blog on The Other Side of Deanna with a list of stories for you to vote on. Then I’ll submit the two with the most votes for consideration in the anthology. If you haven’t read my stories, and would like to, just go to The Other Side of Deanna and click on the Flash Fiction category. So far I’ve written a mix of genres, but the majority are suspense. I hope you enjoy them!

I wish you all a fabulous Thanksgiving with lots of food and love!

Update – busy, busy, busy!

Hey ya’ll. I just wanted to let you know about my medical tests. The ultrasound came back “normal”, according to my doctor, so I have no idea why that radiologist told me there are problems. I’d like to find him and whop him upside the head for making me worry. However, the blood work showed my CBC, (complete blood count), is very high, so I have to have that done again in a couple of weeks, before my next visit with my doctor on the 11^th. The nurse that called me didn’t tell me what the doctor’s suspicions may be as to the reason, so I looked it up. By the way, I’m very careful about getting medical information from the internet. I always view legitimate sites, such as WebMD or the CDC, places like that, rather than people’s blogs or comments on articles. I believe the horror stories alone could be subliminal enough to lead to unnecessary worry.

There are several possible reasons for a high reading of a CBC, including heart problems, kidney disease, tissue damage, and the presence of infection. It could be as simple as dehydration. So, there are too many possible variables for me to try to figure it out on my own. I’m not going to worry about it. It’s in God’s hands and I know he’ll take care of me. Thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers! That means the world to me.

Meanwhile, I’m busy, busy, busy trying to get ahead with work, (the day job). I’m taking the Wednesday before Thanksgiving, and the Monday after off, (we’re already off for a paid holiday on Thursday and Friday), so I’ve got to make sure everything is caught up. The hubby and my sons are going to PA to visit his mom and step-dad. I was going too but then we realized we can’t afford to kennel the dog and we have no place to keep the Chinese Water Dragon, (fancy name for a lizard). Yes, I’m sad I won’t be with the boys on Thanksgiving, especially since the hubby’s birthday is Thanksgiving day, but I’m looking on the bright side – I’ll get to be with my own family, my mom, dad, sisters and their families, and I’ll have four whole days to myself. Guess what I’m going to do. That’s right – write! The hubby is hoping I’ll clean the house, and I may actually pick up the broom one day, but I am not about to spend all my free time cleaning. Heck no! I’m hoping to bank a few flash pieces during this time and may even look into submitting a query for one of my short stories. That would be a big step for me by the way.

What are ya’ll doing for Thanksgiving? I hope you get to be with your loved ones and that you have some “me” time too.